What the mission field has taught me: reflecting back on 2019

2019 is almost over and it is during the hustle and bustle of this time of year that I step back, grab a notebook and pen, a hot cup of tea and sit in quiet solitude thinking back over the last year….yeah right. It is more of reflecting on the year while removing cat claws from my hands and legs while de-boning chicken, shushing dogs that are barking at the inevitable death awaiting all of us at the hand of the delivery boy and his motorcycle at the house up the street, a toddler throwing balls as he does “bulling” (bowling) with empty two liter bottles as pins, and a husband listening to various YouTube videos while working on the computer at full blast. The cacophony of noise is often overwhelming, but it is my family and I love them!

            I do not want to focus on personal ups and downs, but rather, mission-specific lessons, both the good and the bad. Yes, not everything on the mission field is positive; in fact, more negative things happen than positive ones. But that is how it goes, that is what serving others and spreading the Gospel is like, mostly thorns but the roses you get out of it are well worth it. The old saying “if only one…” yes, it is absolutely worth it even I only one soul is saved.

            I think the biggest lesson I learned is that friendly fire [metaphorically] is a very real thing. The people that are supposed to be in your corner and supporting you, often cause the greatest damage, intentionally or not. On more than one occasion a mission team, person, or another missionary has said or done something that has taken more than a year to fix, all because they disagreed with something we said or did, but did not take the time to see for themselves if we had a reason for what we said or did.

            Along the same vein, I learned that missionaries need to stick together. If you cannot work or get along with another missionary than perhaps missions is not your calling. We are supposedly all working towards the same goal, but if we cannot be loving towards each other, how can we show Christ’s love to those we are trying to save/serve?  It is just not possible. Doctrinal differences included, the only reason to not work with another person on the mission field is if they are preaching a different gospel and if that is the case, they are not really missionaries and should be reached out too as well.

            Another thing the mission field has taught me is that even the smallest seed, something we may not even see as ministry can be, and often is a tool to preach the gospel. First aid, a conversation, showing genuine care for a person, these everyday actions speak volumes on the field.

            Once you have been on the field serving in a specific area for a length of time (at least a year, 2 is better) people drop their guards and facades and you see the genuine person that they are. I have always hated hypocrisy and after spending 4 years on the mission field, my hypocrisy radar has really been fine-tuned. Because the community knows us, they have let go of the facades they presented at first and just act like they do in everyday life. On more than one occasion we have seen people’s true colors and have better understood what the ongoing issues in the community are/have been and have been able to be more effective in mediating issues that have been brought to us…or rather Jonathan.

 I also learned that even Christ was tired doing ministry work. It is hard and tiring, especially when balancing full-time work and family life. Through grad school and extended family issues (on both sides) and we basically burn the candle at both ends. People need you at all times and every day and you just can’t meet their every need. You always feel like you are never doing enough and discouragement is a constant. But when you see one person baptized you get a renewed strength to keep going, because your effort helped one soul, maybe there are more you can reach.

            Finally, I learned that it is okay to ask for help and accept it from others. This was a hard one for me. I was raised to work hard and make things happen and not accept help from people. Just pull yourself up by your bootstraps so to speak. I still agree with this, but I have learned that Adonai will use other people to help you and you are robbing them of a blessing and being prideful to refuse help, especially if you have been praying for it. It is fine to receive just as it is fine to give.

            So, this year has been full of lessons, both personal life lessons, as well as ministry and spiritual lessons. I hope to continue to grow and that 2020 provides more insight into how to better serve others, regardless of nationality, language, economic status, and gender.

            Until next time, may Adonai bless you and your homes. Happy Hanukkah!

Does it matter?

      I can see that I have not posted since April. I did not realize it had been so long. During these few months, I have finished my Master's degree and have done various other, boring, yet time-consuming things. I have been crocheting like crazy and I will post about what I have made in the near future. We decided that I would make all our Hanukkah/New Year gifts this year, so I started in Septemeber (I did make one item in June) and I have been going like crazy. I have 24 gifts to make and I believe I have 14 done. I have also done baby gifts and a wedding gift, so I have been busy, busy, busy with crochet!

     As is well known, I have had to quit working due to medical issues. Jonathan has started an electrical business but it is slow in growing. The lord is providing for our daily needs, but sadly, we will have to leave our house in December. We are unsure where we are going to live, but we are looking at a couple of options. Our income has decreased so much that we just cannot keep up with all the bills. Rent is something that has to be cut so we are cutting it and exploring other options for living arrangements.

     Additionally, first aid care has seemed to increase just as drastically as our income decreased. I am praying about pursuing further medical training when my health is finally straightened out. Teaching no longer seems to be where the Lord wants me. I would appreciate your prayers for wisdom on this. I have always enjoyed medical but never pursued it due to my poor math skills. But maybe it is time to re-examine that option. I am also going to apply myself and focus on increasing my Spanish. Enough of this not being able to communicate stuff!

     Now, onto the actual intended content of this post:

     What do I mean when I say "does it matter"? Jonathan and I have spent a lot of time discussing various doctrinal things, as a ministry couple is inclined to do. One thing I often say is "does it matter" and Jonathan always has to step back and think about it to see if I am being heretical or not! Of course, I am not talking about things related to salvation, I usually refer to things that are like splitting hairs, however one concept I said this too just about escalated our discussion into an argument (it didn't, but almost did). We were discussing the topic of heaven.

    "What!!! How can you say 'does it matter' about heaven"???. That was exactly Jonathan's response! Let me clarify what I mean. The Bible is actually pretty vague about what heaven is. We as humans have added our own traditions, imaginings, and interpretations about heaven, but Scripture is actually very vague. The only thing Scripture states is that it is a place and that we will be with Adoani for eternity. After this, we only have mankind's conjectures.

     Before you stone me for heresy, hear me out. We need to understand what "heaven" is because a commonly asked question is "why should I follow Christ?" A common answer is "to have eternal life with God in heaven". Well, what is heaven? A variety of answers follows this question, but does it matter if we know what heaven is? Isn't eternal life with Adonai enough?

    Here are a few examples of what I have personally heard heaven is:
1) The New Jerusalem here on Earth
2) A New Earth
3) Living with the Angels
4) Being in the throne room 24/7
5) Ruling your own planet (Mormon belief)
I am sure there are more, these are just the ones I have heard the most. But again, does it really matter? Does the actual location and appearance of heaven affect our salvation? More importantly, does it affect whether or not you accept Christ as your Lord and Saviour? No, it absolutely should not. That is what I mean by "does it matter"?

     While here on Earth we are commanded to spread the Gospel, baptize people and create disciples.  Anything else is extra, and although it is important to study, it honestly does not matter if souls are not being saved.

    Another thing I often say "does it matter" too, is end-time prophecy and study. I acknowledge that the end of time is approaching and the Lord will return soon. But again, I still firmly believe our focus should be on saving souls, not debating if we will meet our end by nuclear warfare or if we will be forced into hiding or another exodus, or anything else like that. The end-time prophecy is more about what will happen and less about when it will happen. My experience with these teachings has been okay, but everyone became so focused on end-time signals, that no one even thought about evangelism. We were all preparing for the end, keeping ourselves in a community, planning on keeping our faith strong and together, while ignoring anyone not a part of our faith. I am grieved when I think about how I was in agreement with that for many years. And now, I look back and ask, "does it matter?"

    Does it matter if you wear clothes of mixed fibers? Does it matter if heaven is Jerusalem on Earth, or Jerusalem in heaven? Does it matter what the end of time occurrences are? How is your salvation affected by this? More importantly, how is someone else's salvation effected? Are we spending so much time debating these things that the wheat right under our noses is withering away because we are to busy to notice it is ready to be harvested?

    I encourage everyone to study everything for themselves and to continue to grow spiritually, but when it comes to saving souls I ask you to consider what is most important for them to know? Does it matter for their salvation? That should always be asked when talking with whether new or non-believers. Does it matter for salvation?

    I hope to post again soon. May Adonai richly bless you and your homes.

What Now?

The last month was full of unexpected things, both good and bad. And with the school year entering its final quarter, we are looking ahead at what the near future holds.

At the end of June I will be officially leaving classroom teaching. I am in the process of interviewing for some online tutoring places and we are going to start some intermediate and advanced English classes as well. However, even with picking up tutoring and doing odd jobs, the income is not reliable so we are looking at other options.

We are actively pursuing and are in the process of starting a crochet business and an electrical business. The idea for my crochet business is that the focus will be bags and baby items. Those are the things that will sell here, but we will also have some other misc. things as I feel inclined to make them. Ultimately, we want to employ the women at Cancela who are now making things to sell but we have to start with building the business.

I placed a yarn order last week to start making bags but we found out a member of our church is in urgent need of a backpack, so I will be using the yarn for that and saving up to get more. I would like to make market bags, backpacks, purses, diaper bags, etc. The possibilities and creativity are endless. I even found a site that will sell the yarn at wholesale prices if I buy in a large enough quantity. I do not see that being a problem! We just have to come up with the money first. I have a couple of leads on places I can set up temporary stands to sell things so once I have stock, I will do that. Jonathan is designing the website and tags and such for me so we can save money that way. I am also starting a crochet YouTube channel so once that goes active I will post a link to it.

Since the future is still largely unknown, we ask for prayer for wisdom, patience and strength It is scary to walk away from the only steady income we have had, but my health just will not allow me to continue teaching in the traditional classroom setting. So, please keep us in your prayers and I will keep you updated as everything develops and unfolds.

Another update

Hello everyone!

 It has been a hot minute since I last wrote. There has been a lot going on and honestly, I haven’t really known where to start when it came to a post. But I will just plunge in and hopefully it will all make sense.

Amos is doing very, very well. He is wanting to potty-train, is starting to brush his teeth and is currently engaged in a battle with us about weening off of formula completely. He loves doing things with his hands and is speaking Spanglish but comprehends both languages perfectly. He also appears to be a lefty because he throws, bats and grabs things predominantly with his left hand. Since Guapo and I are both righties, I am saying that Tio Jovanny is the one to blame!

Jonathan is teaching for 1.5 hours two days a week and doing electrical and other things during the day. He is trying to launch an electrical business so is doing a lot of odd jobs to get word of mouth going. His after school teaching of robotics (the 1.5 hours, two days a week) is going well and he plans on continuing that for a while.

My brother Matt and sister-in-law Colleen came to visit for a week last month. It was very nice to have them visit. We had a good time and I hope they come again soon. Amos loved playing with Tio and Tia.

There is also a team here currently. They are from a university and are educating the people of Cancela about trash clean-up and not burning it, as well as how to clean the water barrels and prevent mosquitoes from breeding in it. In addition, they are helping construct some aquaponics systems for the church so we can teach the community to garden. They have been very helpful and we are grateful to them.

But now onto sad news. Over the past several months I have been struggling with life and my health some more. I was debating about what to do but after a couple of occurrences at school, confirmation outside of school, and with Jonathan’s agreement and support, I have decided to leave traditional teaching permanently at the end of this year. It was a hard and sad choice to make but we feel it is the right one (Another reason why Jonathan is trying very hard to launch his business). I complete my Masters in August and I will then pursue TEFL certification. I hope to tutor TEFL students but that will be on a schedule I can control and the amount of work I can handle. I am also applying for online writing jobs (part-time) that I can do from home so I can focus on my family, home and our ministry. If you all know of any online jobs, please let me know!

Ministry is going well. We have had our discouraging times and it is a rollercoaster of excitement and sadness, but that is ministry life. The crochet class continues to grow and Jonathan’s classes are also doing well. The community is slowly changing. Please continue to pray for us as we try to keep doing what the Lord has called us to do.

Well, that is all for now. I hope to be more consistent with my writing in the future. Until next time, may Adonai bless you and your homes.  

Poem

Hello everyone!

      I know it has been a long time since I wrote. The past couple of weeks I have really wanted to write something but just couldn't. However, after a rather tough day on Friday I was inspired to write this poem so I thought I would share it. I hope to have a regular post up soon. 

Why?

Dedicated to the 2018-2019 3^rd grade class of:

Christian Community School, Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic

The other day in class I was asked a rather simple question:

Why?

You see, as a teacher I spend time imprinting knowledge into the minds of my students

But I have never spent a lot of time to explain why.

2+2= 4, 4/8 is the same as 1/2, Thomas Jefferson purchased the Louisiana Territory, a force is needed to put something into motion, the plural of puppy is puppies but the plural of fish is fish.

Just fish, not fishen, fishies or fishes.

Remember that kids or it is a zero on your test.

I spend hours explaining sentence structure and grammar,

The correct format for an essay and the differences between the different kinds of poetry.

The students watch the videos, take their notes, and do their work,

But 6 months through the school year they ask:

Why?

Why do we`1 need all this knowledge when we have calculators and google at our fingertips?

Why is it important to know that a proper noun is capitalized but the others aren’t, when we have spell check? Why do we need to know how sound waves travel when we spend our time with earbuds in our ears? Why do we need to know cursive when I can write in print and can type faster than either of those?

And why on earth,

Teacher,

Do you think Superman is better than Spiderman?

I stand there and look out at my class,

eyes awaiting my answer,

and I do not know how to respond to such a complex yet so simple a question.

How can I explain to these young minds that all of this information serves a bigger purpose than just passing a test?

How do you explain to 9 year olds the concept of learning from the past?

Understanding what happened then,

So it doesn’t happen again.

How do you explain the importance of critical thinking and analysis to youthful thinkers?

And how do you stress the importance of being able to write and speak with such conviction and grammatical correctness that you gain respect from those in authority?

How do you explain that understanding the Bible helps you understand life?

You see, in school you learn things you think you will never use again. You answer the questions on the test then move on, not remembering that fact for years.

Hitler was a dictator, Russia is a communist country, King Henry the VIII had 6 wives, and the laws of physics prove the strength of Captain America’s shield is actually,

impossible.

But what do we learn in school that is proven to be true?

We learn that speaking with authority gives you more credit from your listeners, this includes knowing the myriads of ways the O-U-G-H is used, the Bain of the English language.

We learn that although spelling doesn’t always make sense, learning to spell helps when you try to get a job.

We learn that objects always move in the direction of a force so that means if you throw a ball at a window it is going to break it because it won’t suddenly change direction. So don’t be surprised if your Mom doesn’t buy your “I didn’t mean to” story.

We learn that you can’t outrun a cheetah so don’t even try, but most importantly

We learn that words have meaning and weight and how you use them

matters.

You see, when we speak or write to others what we say can be interpreted many ways.

How we speak, where we breathe, it all makes a difference and sometimes what you say at home,

Hurts someone at school.

The why goes beyond just information, the why is because you need to know it to succeed, to be respected, too function in society.

But how do you explain that to ten sets of brown eyes focused on you just wanting 10 extra minutes of recess rather than a worksheet about commas?

How do you explain that my only goal as a teacher is to teach them to teach themselves, because there will be a day when no one else will?

How do you explain that while I know this, and their parents know this, their innocent minds see this as unnecessary torture imposing on their carefree lives?

How do I explain it?

“Because I am your teacher and you have to learn it, that’s why”.